It's given and ain't because of what i'm doing for a living,
It's more because of what I do and how i'm living.
Today I was in complete darkness and you showed me the light,
How I could manage without you? I wouldn't be able to manage at all.
I bawled my eyes out because of family problems and you were there in a
quick second. I actually just came home right now, harhar I dropped myself home.
You laughed at me because I squeak when I cry, shutup .. you still love me
even IF i sound like a dying seal. We talked everything out in your car and it's the first
time somebody actually understood me, not seeing past me .. but seeing right through me. You held me so tight that I fell inlove with your scent of cool water (: It's so funny because i didn't want you to see me cry at all, I hate seeing you see me cry cause I know it hurts you THAT much. I hate the fact that you came here even though you were dead tired and had rolled your socks up high, like a geek. Cute, sometimes. I love how you don't regret being with me at all , never once. I hope you're not lying. You made me feel even better by letting me drive on the road and I did so much better today. The trust bar is growing.
- Love you toast.
-
I'm trying to love life right now, please don't rain on my parade.
I can't belive your getting re - married, I know i'm supposed to be happy for you
but i'm losing my one and only father and my real brother. How's life going to be after this shit? I already lost ma, she's brainwashed by flesh eating step - father . I don't consider him a step - father at all .. Now you? I don't even see you , need I say more? Having to grow up by yourself isn't easy and you wonder why I don't want to go with you .. You know why. I love you and all, but I don't love the fact that you don't give a fuck. The love you and ma both have I wished you showed it a little more, I mean the little stuff like materialistic shit don't matter. You don't have to be together but I want to see both of you care, not unconditionally .. I just want you to care. I'm tired of going home just to eat, sleep, change, shower, use the computer. I swear I don't even talk to anybody in this house. You wonder why I don't want to go home.
All I want for my sixteenth birthday is nothing big, just a family.
My family. I want to show this to you, but I bet you guys aren't even going to care.
I'm trying to love what I got in my life so far and make the best of it
without you guys there.
